“Your story may not have such a happy beginning, but that doesn’t make you who you are. It is the rest of your story. Who you choose to be.” --Soothsayer, Kung Fu Panda 2
“I didn’t see my mother nor my father. I haven’t met them. No picture. No memories. I’ve been raised by strangers.”
“If only my father was gentle to my mother. They could have stayed together and we might not be here.”
“My mother left me. She even never said goodbye. I don’t know the reason.”
“The couple who fostered me and gave me home have shattered the very idea of home.”
Beginning. Once upon a time.
These are the stories of the beginnings of some of the older residents in CSC. Flipping the pages of their lives into the past would take a lot of courage and relationship. Some chose to seal those pages; while others are open about their once-upon-a-times. In counseling, children often share about their days, their dreams, as well as their past. For a child to paint these stories allows us to help them craft their life story.
“Life story is essential in developing one’s personality, values, and meaning. It’s the integration of reconstructed past and imagined future to provide life with some degree of unity and purpose.” --McAdams & McLean, Narrative Identity, 2013
Although this process may resurface the phantoms of the past, it helps the older resident embrace his/her whole story. By embracing his/her painful once-upon-a-time, it paves the way to acceptance and forgiveness. For some older residents, it was a privilege to hear them express how they acknowledge that no matter how painful their past was, it happened, it happened, it happened. It happened and they saw the collateral beauty of that pain. They are here. They are here with people who love them; who cares for them; who believes in them; who brought back the cape of their childhood; who gives them wings to soar the new horizon.
As our older residents navigate the new waters of independent living, they are more open to building bridges to their past. For some, they have birth families that they can return to; while others are starting to put together the pieces of their beginning. Their new journey is a navigation of mirth and melancholy; hopes and despair; and success and failures. They are now in the process of writing the new chapter, or perhaps, the sequel of their stories. Seeing the collateral beauty, they now have the power to restructure their future and have the power to direct their own narrative— narrative of an iridescent hope.
Thomas is Home!!
Little Thomas is home! After two weeks of being in the hospital, from the operating room to the ICU to a private room, he was allowed to go home on Tuesday. It was an exciting day for everyone at CSC, especially in the Duterte Home. Our Head Nurse Warlita Manlon said it best in the car on the way home. "We are blessed to have Thomas in our lives." How true. We ask you to continue praying for him as he recovers from the surgery to his skull, and that we would take very good care of him in our nursery.
A little miracle
Sometimes I am called upon to step in and help diffuse a situation happening in a classroom. Yesterday that happened again. A student who was bothering his classmates needed some help. This was someone who had had trouble complying with rules and expressing frustration appropriately when he arrived at the shelter. He was having trouble again yesterday.
After leaving the classroom, I had him cool down while sitting in a chair near me. After a few minutes we talked. He said he was angry and why. He told me what he had done to his classmates to tell them he was angry. We figured out what he should have done differently to tell his classmates he wanted them to stop. He said he’d try that next time. In the world of counseling and school, it was textbook stuff for learning social skills.
As we walked back to his classroom, I marveled at how much he has learned about how to express himself in positive ways when he is frustrated or angry. I thought of the people (counselors, house parents and teachers) who have coached him and modeled this for him.
As we entered the classroom together, he apologized to his classmates and sat down in his seat. Class continued.
A little miracle in the midst of a busy day.
Centralites Are Here
Central Baptist Church of Saint Paul, Minnesota, the home church of Paul and Marlys Healy and Mitch and Ruth Ohlendorf, has sent a team of 11 members to CSC to visit the ministry, fellowship with the children, staff and workers, and run a three day camp for the older children at the Shelter. This has become an every other year tradition at CSC, and hundreds of kids have enjoyed being a part of these camps over the years. The camp will be held in a Christian camp on the beach in Santander in southern Cebu. The kids will have time in the ocean, hiking, playing games, sleeping in tents, eating good food, doing crafts and learning more about God. Chuck Sorley, the youth pastor at Central, will head up the camp once again. Pastor Joel Lawrence is also with the team. He has been busy speaking to various groups, from CSC staff and workers, to the students of the Baptist Theological College.
Thanks to the team for their willingness to come and serve, and for those who are supporting them through prayer and financial gifts.
A meaningful morning
I can't help but feel closer to God after visiting Thomas at the hospital. Thomas was sleeping; he had had his dressing changed earlier and had cried a bit, so he might have tired himself out. I chatted with the Auntie, getting a quick update on how he was doing. There has been some drainage from the surgical site over the last couple of days, so there is a potential for infection! :(
I prayed over him and held his hand, but thought I should let him rest, so soon left. As I was leaving the hospital, I could not help but think on how Thomas is such a testament to God's provision. We have had several meetings, even since before admitting him, about Thomas, his needs and our ideas about how we could meet them. We prayed a lot about these concerns and sought guidance, but inevitably, just had to surrender them to God. And we have seen God provide time and time again. The financial assistance has come through, but even more than that, our plans for how to respond to the problems or possibilities we feared would occur were not even necessary.
God is good.
Sleepy at the moment, but still such a trooper!
His toys, the books he likes to "read," tissue and a Bible---the essentials!
Here he is, receiving excellent care from his Auntie. We are blessed at CSC to have such caring childcare workers!
All the time, God is good. And we have seen His goodness in Thomas' life so many times already and countless times over the life of CSC.
Monday Update: Thomas Leaves ICU Behind.
MONDAY UPDATE: Thomas leaves ICU. No more fever. He loves books and the aunties love reading to him.
SATURDAY UPDATE: Thomas had his dressing changed today. He has staples from ear to ear. The doctor checked the surgical site and said that it looks good, with no sign of infection. Thomas was very alert and responsive today, and he made lots of eye contact with his caregivers. Matt Buley, CSC President, who is in Cebu at this time, had a chance to visit Thomas in the ICU and see his progress in recovery. Matt and Marlys brought along a radio and cd player so he could listen to music which he loves.
FRIDAY: Little Thomas continues his fight,making good progress after his serious surgery on Tuesday. He is still in the Intensive Care Unit at Cebu Doctors' hospital. Yesterday his face was very puffy and he was more uncomfortable than he had been on Wednesday. But today his swelling has subsided. He still has a low grade fever (100.7) which is normal after his kind of surgery. The doctors told us that they will be taking the dressing off tomorrow. As of today, our child care worker who is with him in the ICU is allowed to hold him, which he very much appreciates. It is possible that Thomas will be able to
go out of ICU tomorrow to a regular room.
Thanks for your prayers for our darling boy! A couple weeks ago, as the surgery was being discussed among specialists in Cebu, his doctor mentioned that he is a little battler, so we all need to battle for him to. Thanks for helping the battle through prayer.
We are so excited and thankful that some CSC friends who have followed Thomas on-line, have responded with financial gifts.
Praise God that, of the estimated costs of $25,000 for the surgery and recovery, $8,000 has already been provided!