Staff Blog
How can people be so heartless?
How can people be so cruel?
Easy to be hard, easy to be cold
How can people have no feelings?
How can they ignore their friends?
Easy to be proud, easy to say no.
Songwriters: Ragni, Gerome / Rado, James / Mac Dermot, Galt
The words of this song from the late 60s were brought to mind recently when a 12 year-old boy was referred to us. His story reveals the heartlessness and cruelty of people, and the ways that some children have to suffer at their hands. We'll call this boy Roberto and his younger brother, Michael.
Roberto and Michael were brought to an orphanage in Cebu City when they were babies. The orphanage, which was connected to a Protestant church, was not a good place. When the boys were older they were abused. Punishment was severe, sometimes cruel. The lady who was in charge of the place was the one dealing out the beatings. Luckily, the place was closed down and the children were parceled out to other child caring institutions. CSC got three girls from that place, but we did not have room for boys at the time, so Roberto and his brother, then nine and 10, went to live at a home for children on a neighboring island. Shortly after there arrival there, one of the boys threatened Roberto. (The home catered to older kids, and their residents included some who had lived on the streets and were used to fighting and intimidation.) On the second night they were there, Roberto decided to run away. Michael was afraid to go out into the dark night, but Roberto was able to find a young boy, just five years old, to go with him. The gate was always left open so they had no trouble getting away.
Roberto only knew one place to go, back to the church where he had lived. He didn't know that it was 18 miles from where they were starting out. And they had to cross a long bridge that led to Cebu island. But he knew he wanted to leave that place, so off they went into the night.
It took two days and nights to get to the church. They slept
along the road, wherever they could find a spot that looked safe. On the second
morning Roberto woke up and discovered that his little companion was gone.
Without a trace. All he could do was keep going. When he finally got to the
church he found that it was closed up. The gate was locked. One of the former
orphanage workers said that he could be their family's houseboy, but that didn't
last for long. One day that family packed up and left, and Roberto had no place
to go.
Out of desperation, he found a big piece of cardboard which
became his bed for the 
next months. He slept just outside the locked gate of
the former church/orphanage. He would look for food wherever
he could find it, in garbage cans or occasional handouts from neighbors. Other
times he would steal food to feed his hungry stomach, which enraged people in
the community. He was often beaten by neighborhood boys. One family took pity
on him and would stop the boys from beating him, and would give him food. Life
was hard for Roberto. No place to live. Nobody to take him in. He missed his
brother and worried about the boy who had disappeared along the way. How can
people be so heartless? How can they be so cruel?
One of the compassionate neighbors knew about CSC and informed us about the situation of Roberto. We get lots of referrals and can not respond immediately to all of them. Eventually our social worker and counselor went to visit Roberto and hear his story. They were overwhelmed by the things that had happened to him. In the next few days we made contact with the place where Michael was staying and arranged a meeting with their social worker. Two of our social workers, Chris and our new Social Worker Director, Klaris, and our counselor, Eldie, made the trip to the neighboring island to discuss the boys' case. Michael was relieved to hear that Roberto was okay. He hadn't heard anything about him for a year and a half. Both boys wanted to be reunited and it was determined that this should happen the next day at CSC.
The reunion was so sweet for the boys. They were more than a
little amazed at the facilities of CSC and the course of events that had
brought them back together. After more counseling and some medical
tests, and a talk with a representative of the place where Michael was living,
our staff made the decision to admit Michael and Roberto. The boys would no
longer be separated and Roberto's days of homelessness would end. It was an
exciting day for all of us. They boys needed to go back to their respective
places, get the few things they owned, and say goodbye before becoming official
CSC kids. But first we brought them to Jollibee, a fast food restaurant near
CSC. It was so much fun to watch the boys eat and laugh. It must have seemed a
little surreal to them to be together at that place with a group of adults who
were concerned about them and wanted them to be together in a nice and safe place.
Roberto was not able to finish his chicken and we were surprised when he asked
if he could have a bag for "take-home."
When they got to the place where Roberto had been staying, he ran to one of the houses near the church, the place where one of the people who had protected him from the cruel boys lived. This was the first person who had shown concern for him, maybe in his whole life. Roberto wanted to give this guy the leftover chicken from Jollibee! It was one of the most touching things that we have known about in our many years of working with kids. A few acts of kindness had made a huge difference in Roberto's life and he wanted to say "thank you" in the only way he knew how.
Later that day the boys were
officially admitted, and spent the night in the infirmary while 
we waited for
their lab results. The next morning they moved into the Cherne Home, where
house parents Tarex and Pureza and the children welcomed them. It was the
biggest day in their lives, so far. And there are many big days ahead. They
will be making a lot of new friends and will soon be enrolled in our Children
of Hope School. They won't be apart. They won't be hungry. If they are sick
they will be provided with the best medical care available in the Philippines.
If they are sad they'll be comforted. And they will get the chance to learn
about a loving Heavenly Father and a friend and Savior who will never abandon
them.
Yes, its easy to be heartless. Easy to be cruel. But its also easy to be kind. Easy to be a needed friend. Kids need a friend. Thanks to all who make it possible for us to say yes to kids like these two and the many others who need the love and care of our Shelter.
An Evening in the Home
After a day of learning in school and fun on the playground, the kids settle down for an evening inside the houses.
Suppertime is a busy time, with lots of kids around the tables refueling for the next day. After the kids join the “clean plate club” by finishing all the food on their plates—even the vegetables, it is time to help clean up. Some kids are assigned to sweep the floor, wipe the tables, and wash the dirty dishes.
Homework comes next. The kids spread out around the house. The dinner table is transformed into a big desk. A few aunties take over as tutors. Some kids like to do their homework in their room. Some kids grab a chair and sit around the coffee table downstairs. The school Reading Challenge has taken over homework time.
August has become “Reading Challenge” month. For several years, the kids have an added incentive to discover the great books on the shelves in the library. The kids actually do not have a problem taking advantage of the library throughout the year, but it is fun to create excitement for reading. Each level has a reading goal appropriate for their abilities. At the end of the month, totals will be tallied and winners will be announced.
After homework is done for the evening, it is time to play. The preschoolers actually get to play most of the evening since they have less homework. Crosswords, building blocks, animals, and much more fill the rest of the evening.
Finally it is time to put everything away and go to sleep, to be ready for the next day.
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Wishing away the years
I overheard a conversation the other day while waiting for a friend to arrive to lunch. Near my table two guys, apparent former coworkers, bumped into each other.
It was odd. After exchanging greetings the one asked, "so, how long you got?" Hopefully my face didn't betray that I was eavesdropping, because I was confused enough by the question to let on. Were these guys prison inmates? It sounded like he was asking, "how long are you in for?"
It turns out he basically was. Both men were nearing retirement, and the crux of their conversation had to do with how much longer they had to work. They were counting down the years until they could quit.
I hope I don't ever have a job in which I wish away years of my life because of it. In college I had one that caused me to wish away days, and that was bad enough. On my way to work in the morning I'd look at the other side of the highway and daydream I could press fast-forward and automatically be on the other side heading home. It wasn't a very uplifting commute.
I'm not sure what line of work those guys in the restaurant were in, but I'd bet they weren't missionaries. I know several missionaries. They have really hard jobs--and there are certainly days they wish would end. They work tons of hours, live far from family, have to learn a culture and are constantly putting others ahead of themselves. But, wow, do they live lives of purpose.
Are you wondering what you're going to do with your life? There are many good jobs out there, and many paths to take. Don't forget that missions is a valid one...including at the Children's Shelter of Cebu. We will have needs for teachers, administrators, coordinators and practitioners to work alongside our Filipino leaders in the coming years. I can promise it would be a challenge, and a career full of purpose.
If you think you might have what it takes to be a missionary, shoot me a line at cscusa@cscshelter.org. I'd love to chat with you.
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Workers Working Hard
It takes 75 child care workers to give the hands-on daily care to the children. Diapers need to be changed, babies need to be held, meals need to be cooked, the homes need to be cleaned, children need to be read to, loads and loads of laundry need to be washed, and of course the playground is a very busy place after school.
Twenty-two workers have flexible schedules to fill in for other workers who are absent and to give one-on-one care for sick children and new children.
Several children have left for adoption in the past several months. With vacant space in the homes, CSC has been admitting new children. When they first arrive, the new children need to be kept separate from the other children until cleared by the doctors to join their new home. These children are not left alone, of course. A child care worker is always with them.
The one-on-one care is a blessing for the children. From the moment new children enter the shelter, love is given directly and specifically to them. In some cases this is a new experience for the children.
These are some of the child care workers who give loving care to new children from the moment the children enter the shelter.
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38 years ago....
this guy was born!
I don't know that story, at least not all the details. But I know it was August 8, 1976. And that it was a special day. God brought Joemar into this world, knowing full well the kind of blessing he would be to so very many people. Fast forward several years to July 15, 1985, when Joemar was admitted to CSC. The details of those in between years are also not all known, but I can guarantee that he saw things or exerienced things we wish he never had. He was probably scared at times, maybe even hurt and he undoubtedly went without. That is, of course, why he came to CSC.
It is easy to forget that Joemar has a story that precedes CSC. He is so at home here. He belongs here and it just would not be the same without him. It is also easy to forget that he ever knew pain or heartache because he is just so joyful. He loves life with a contagious fervor. I cannot help but smile when he greets me at my vehicle each morning, saying, "Ning, Sy" (Good morning, Lindsay). He then holds out his arm to take my computer bag for me. He then walks with me to my office, carrying my bag the whole way until he puts it next to my desk. He immediately begins sweeping the floor and sharing with me whatever news he has. Some of it I can put together, other bits only he really knows what he is saying. Either way, I like having him there.
The excitement Joemar had for his birthday was palpable. His house mother informed me that he had woken up before 4am---too excited to sleep anymore. In the several weeks preceding his birthday, he had talked to me every day about the cake for his birthday. He knew I was the one that got the cakes and ice cream for each party. But the flavor he wanted changed every day! We finally decided on ube and he stuck to that. But the day before his birthday, he had mentioned that he was going to have 3 cakes and he held up 3 fingers. Now, Joemar does not always get his numbers right, but I had to laugh anyways because he was still indicating that he wanted more than 1 cake. :)
Unbeknownst to him, there would be 2 cakes for his day. One cake (ube) would be for him and his guests at his birthday, but there as another cake that was brought to him while he was working. Joemar works at McDonald's every day. He loves it and they love him. The employees at McDonald's are so happy to see him and love having him there. Even if we take Joemar to a McDonald's at a different location, he inevitably has friends there. This cake was a birthday cake and a "Thank you, McDonald's cake," for all that they do for him.
Auntie Sandy, (or Sausy) as he calls her, and I had surprised him there at the end of his shift. He was happiest when he had visitors! But he still felt pressed to do his job, he left for a bit to clear off some tables and he was worried that the second level of the restaurant needed his attention! After the picture taking, he started to leave with us but the other workers called out that he had forgotten his food. They sent him home with a chicken and spaghtetti meal, some Coke and a McFlurry. He was beaming!
It was a day of celebrations culminating into the big party at his house. He could not wait. If you talk to Joemar, within 5 minutes or so, Superman will usually enter the conversation. Joemar LOVES anything Superman ("Perman" usually followed by the flying arm movement)! There were going to be Superman gifts and he was so excited! But there were also Superman decorations!
Joemar was also looking forward to having Uncle Sio and Uncle Eldie attend his birthday party. He often assists Uncle Sio or watches what he is working on as Uncle Sio is always doing interesting projects around the grounds.
Uncle Eldie is one of our counselors and Joemar makes a point to visit his office during the day also, to share news with him.
Last but not least, was the gift opening! Superman everything and he couldn't be happier!
What a joy to celebrate Joemar's birthday with him! And what a privilege to get to know him and be a part of his life. He is such a precious gift from God and he has blessed CSC in countless ways over the past (almost) 30 years he has lived here.
Thanks for all of your facebook messages for him on his special day and thanks for all of the prayers prayed and the stories shared about Joemar!
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Order to Eating
Most kids need encouragement to eat their vegetables. Some kids are always leaving the food they like less on their plate until last. Other kids just eat everything in front of them.
At a school activity I sat next to a boy who eating the last bit of his snack. I asked which one of the four snacks he liked the best. He said the one he was eating. He explained he liked to eat the least tasty thing first and work his way to the best. He ranks the parts of his meals and decides on an order in which to eat each part.
I smiled and nodded. I knew exactly what he was talking about. I do the exact same thing. Call us crazy, but that is how we like to eat.
It is fun to see how kids think. I wonder what I will learn about one of the kids today?
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