God's grace shows itself to me in many ways. Some are glorious and some are not. By the grace of God, for instance, I have enough to eat, a good place to live, money for my diabetes medications and meaningful work that provides many emotional, material and spiritual blessings. But just 0utside my office are children who go to sleep hungry, who wake up with nobody to say "good morning," and with only bleak prospects for having their basic needs met. This noon I drove to McDonalds for a late lunch and was heading back to the office to eat. At the stoplight a little boy approached my car, tapped on my window and held out a deformed hand to ask for money. He motioned to his stomach to indicate that he was hungry. In his eyes was a hunger that went beyond his need for something to eat to indicate a hopelessness at life in general. But he doesn't have the luxury of looking at his life reflectively. He was hungry, and was looking at the food that I had purchased at the drive through that was on the seat next to me, food that I could easily do without. I gave him a handful of fries and drove off. On other occasions I might have just shook my head and not given him anything. Nutritionists might say that he was better off with nothing than a greasy fry, I don't know. But as I drove away my mind came up with many questions that I have considered often in my 38 years in Cebu, questions that don't really have answers but weigh heavily on my heart on occasions such as this.
- Why does this little guy have nothing and I have everything? Is there a single thing about how I have lived my life that qualifies me for advantage? Has this little guy done anything wrong to deserve a withered arm and a hungry tummy?
- Why didn't I just give him my whole lunch instead of a few paltry fries? By suppertime I would be dining on a good meal and he would be hungry again. Likely, I just wanted him to go away from my car.
- What does he think about me and what I represent?
- If he ever does look to the future, does he have a shred of hope that things will get better for him? With little or no positive family or other adult influence, with no access to health care or decent education, and with daily exposure to the many dangers from living on the street, is there any chance whatsoever that he will? What will be different for him, his eventual children and theirs?
- What is life like without hope? Can I even begin to understand that?
The disparities of life in a country like the Philippines are hard to grasp. Living here provides graphic proof that God's grace has nothing to do with merit. Not a thing. That kid deserves a break much more than I ever do or will. All I can do, perhaps, is to think about why God called me to live much of my life here and not in the country of my birth. Some people think that, in choosing to live here, I forsook the luxuries of life for the difficulties of the third world. But I live in the lap of luxury here, too. I just have to pay an emotional price for doing so as I come face to face with people who struggle just to stay alive.
I've been dealing with these same questions for 38 years! At CSC we have been able to help lots of little guys like the one I saw today. We have taken in the hungry, the lame, the disfigured, the homeless. We have dispensed food, medicine, knowledge, even hope. But we aren't helping this little guy at all. Except for a fistfull of fries. Of course we can't help everyone, I know that. But that knowledge doesn't remove his image from my mind or, on the other hand, make his life one ounce better.
I pray for wisdom, to accept the things that I cannot change, to be an agent of positive change where I can, and to know the difference, even though knowing that difference does not provide emotional relief from the confrontations with hopelessness that are a part of life in a place like this. I guess the best way to accomplish the dictates of the above-cited Serenity Prayer is to focus on the things that I can change, not on what I cannot. On the tree, not the forest. But I'm very sure that there are things that I can change if I open my mind to them, to see people not as an inconvenience but an opportunity. Maybe I can use some of the incomprehensible advantages that have been bestowed on me to offer some measure of relief and, maybe, even hope to people like the little boy who I cannot get out of my head.
Love for Jacob
"Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own."
― Robert A. Heinlein
I came upon this quote a few days ago and it's quite fitting to cite it as I share about this little boy. Jaycob came to CSC a few days before his 5th birthday. He didn't seem interactive, something unusual for a new kid his age, but not surprising since we knew beforehand that he has autism. It was a challenge that the staff decided to take, but it was more challenging as the days progressed since he was often irritable and out of control. Furthermore, he was constipated and toilet training was difficult.
Moreover, we found out that Jacob has Hirschsprung's disease, a congenital disease affecting the colon. His doctor advised surgery but in order to do that we needed to decrease the size of his colon. A colostomy was the first option. With Jacob's behaviour we were convinced that a colostomy would be too traumatic for him. The doctor said there was a second option and that was to do daily rectal irrigation. Within a few days, Jacob started to interact with his caregivers. He would no longer push a playmate away. Having this procedure was indeed a relief for him. With love for this precious boy our nursing team performs this challenging procedure – everyday.
More than three months after the daily irrigation, the much awaited colon surgery was done. Now he is able to go on his own. You can see him laughing and playing around just like the other kids. Oh, what a joy it is to see him smile.
Tarzan!
Morning meeting is a great day opener at CCHS!
Each day begins with a group gathering for ten to fifteen minutes. Children say greetings to each other, do some movements, share ideas, and listen to the teacher's message for the day. It is something that children look forward to!
One morning meeting, I raised this question to my class for sharing time, "If you were to ride in a rocket and bring someone with you, who would it be?" I gave my students one minute to think of an answer. Everyone was so quiet and serious except for one boy who kept smiling the whole time.
After the time given, each of my student happily shared their answers. Most of them wanted to bring a friend. One thought of bringing his brother. When I asked the student who was smiling, he didn't answer right away. After a few seconds he said, "Tarzan!" Everyone in class laughed out loud (which was the reaction he was hoping for). Before our morning meeting ended I asked him his reason for wanting Tarzan with him. He didn't give me an answer, just a sweet smile on his face.
A Beautiful Day With a Bat!
It is fun being at school, learning new things together with the kids and trying to widen our understanding of the world. Our class has been focusing on the theme "City Wildlife". My students enjoy noticing the "wildlife" around CSC- the goats, cows, birds, geckos, insects, and occasional snakes.
One beautiful cold day after flag ceremony, my students were getting ready for our Morning Meeting. Part of our Morning Meeting is "Inviting God" so we sang a praise song entitled, "It's a Beautiful Day". While singing, one student noticed something moving inside an empty magazine box. Suddenly it flew out of the box and left our classroom. It was gone before we could even react of what we saw. We just watched it fly away. Who would have thought that there was a bat (wildlife) inside our very own classroom? Maybe there's wildlife also in your community where you least expect it. Watch out!
A day to remember
September 17 was quite a day at CSC. It was the day of our annual Sportsfest held on the CSC playground, involving all our Children of Hope School kids and many of the Aunties and Uncles. There were lots of different events from three legged race to an egg toss, hot air ping pong and lots more. Also on he 1 7th we had visitors from Australia. A family who had adopted a little girl from CSC several years ago were back to visit and see the place where she had lived. She and her brother joined the sportsfest; the more the merrier! We also had a visit from a team of volunteers with Converge, USA who represent churches in the Colorado and Wyoming areas, who wanted an introduction to our ministry. So they came for lunch and a tour. And we also had Joan Gleddie and Eleanore Karsdorf from Canada, who represent our Canadian board, who were here for a special visit. Between the kids, the worker and our visitors we served around 210 meals. And we had a great day. A little wild, perhaps, but lots of fun for everyone.
Buwan ng Wika
The Philippines has an interesting history. In the 1500s it was conquered by Spain and remained under its authority for nearly 300 years. Spain's rule continued until the US fought the Spanish for control of the Philippines in the 1890s. Once the Philippines was under American rule the Filipinos rose up to fight for freedom against America. America didn't give up possession of the Philippines until the 1940s. Despite only being recognized as an independent country for the last 70 years, the Philippines has a rich culture and deep pride.
At Cebu Children of Hope School (CCHS) we celebrated our Filipino pride recently by having a half day festival called Buwan ng Wika. The afternoon started with the kids getting into four groups and rotating through different "game stations". At each station the kids played traditional Filipino games. They had a great time!
The highlight of the cultural festival was the program! Each of the classes performed a Filipino dance to the loud applause of the houseparents, aunties, uncles, several toddlers, as well as our high school students who had school off that day. The CCHS teachers even got in on the fun with a Filipino dance using scarves (they wisely positioned me in the back row). Four pairs of representatives highlighted the culture and fashion of the different regions of the Philippines. The teachers at CCHS did a wonderful job planning this fun event!
We love to celebrate kids at CCHS and the culture we are a part of! Thank you for helping support all of these memorable moments for the children at CSC. Because of you they can be kids again, laughing and playing just like any other child.