How can people be so heartless?
How can people be so cruel?
Easy to be hard, easy to be cold
How can people have no feelings?
How can they ignore their friends?
Easy to be proud, easy to say no.
Songwriters: Ragni, Gerome / Rado, James / Mac Dermot, Galt
The words of this song from the late 60s were brought to mind recently when a 12 year-old boy was referred to us. His story reveals the heartlessness and cruelty of people, and the ways that some children have to suffer at their hands. We'll call this boy Roberto and his younger brother, Michael.
Roberto and Michael were brought to an orphanage in Cebu City when they were babies. The orphanage, which was connected to a Protestant church, was not a good place. When the boys were older they were abused. Punishment was severe, sometimes cruel. The lady who was in charge of the place was the one dealing out the beatings. Luckily, the place was closed down and the children were parceled out to other child caring institutions. CSC got three girls from that place, but we did not have room for boys at the time, so Roberto and his brother, then nine and 10, went to live at a home for children on a neighboring island. Shortly after there arrival there, one of the boys threatened Roberto. (The home catered to older kids, and their residents included some who had lived on the streets and were used to fighting and intimidation.) On the second night they were there, Roberto decided to run away. Michael was afraid to go out into the dark night, but Roberto was able to find a young boy, just five years old, to go with him. The gate was always left open so they had no trouble getting away.
Roberto only knew one place to go, back to the church where he had lived. He didn't know that it was 18 miles from where they were starting out. And they had to cross a long bridge that led to Cebu island. But he knew he wanted to leave that place, so off they went into the night.
It took two days and nights to get to the church. They slept along the road, wherever they could find a spot that looked safe. On the second morning Roberto woke up and discovered that his little companion was gone. Without a trace. All he could do was keep going. When he finally got to the church he found that it was closed up. The gate was locked. One of the former orphanage workers said that he could be their family's houseboy, but that didn't last for long. One day that family packed up and left, and Roberto had no place to go.
Out of desperation, he found a big piece of cardboard which became his bed for the next months. He slept just outside the locked gate of the former church/orphanage. He would look for food wherever he could find it, in garbage cans or occasional handouts from neighbors. Other times he would steal food to feed his hungry stomach, which enraged people in the community. He was often beaten by neighborhood boys. One family took pity on him and would stop the boys from beating him, and would give him food. Life was hard for Roberto. No place to live. Nobody to take him in. He missed his brother and worried about the boy who had disappeared along the way. How can people be so heartless? How can they be so cruel?
One of the compassionate neighbors knew about CSC and informed us about the situation of Roberto. We get lots of referrals and can not respond immediately to all of them. Eventually our social worker and counselor went to visit Roberto and hear his story. They were overwhelmed by the things that had happened to him. In the next few days we made contact with the place where Michael was staying and arranged a meeting with their social worker. Two of our social workers, Chris and our new Social Worker Director, Klaris, and our counselor, Eldie, made the trip to the neighboring island to discuss the boys' case. Michael was relieved to hear that Roberto was okay. He hadn't heard anything about him for a year and a half. Both boys wanted to be reunited and it was determined that this should happen the next day at CSC.
The reunion was so sweet for the boys. They were more than a little amazed at the facilities of CSC and the course of events that had brought them back together. After more counseling and some medical tests, and a talk with a representative of the place where Michael was living, our staff made the decision to admit Michael and Roberto. The boys would no longer be separated and Roberto's days of homelessness would end. It was an exciting day for all of us. They boys needed to go back to their respective places, get the few things they owned, and say goodbye before becoming official CSC kids. But first we brought them to Jollibee, a fast food restaurant near CSC. It was so much fun to watch the boys eat and laugh. It must have seemed a little surreal to them to be together at that place with a group of adults who were concerned about them and wanted them to be together in a nice and safe place. Roberto was not able to finish his chicken and we were surprised when he asked if he could have a bag for "take-home."
When they got to the place where Roberto had been staying, he ran to one of the houses near the church, the place where one of the people who had protected him from the cruel boys lived. This was the first person who had shown concern for him, maybe in his whole life. Roberto wanted to give this guy the leftover chicken from Jollibee! It was one of the most touching things that we have known about in our many years of working with kids. A few acts of kindness had made a huge difference in Roberto's life and he wanted to say "thank you" in the only way he knew how.
Later that day the boys were officially admitted, and spent the night in the infirmary while we waited for their lab results. The next morning they moved into the Cherne Home, where house parents Tarex and Pureza and the children welcomed them. It was the biggest day in their lives, so far. And there are many big days ahead. They will be making a lot of new friends and will soon be enrolled in our Children of Hope School. They won't be apart. They won't be hungry. If they are sick they will be provided with the best medical care available in the Philippines. If they are sad they'll be comforted. And they will get the chance to learn about a loving Heavenly Father and a friend and Savior who will never abandon them.
Yes, its easy to be heartless. Easy to be cruel. But its also easy to be kind. Easy to be a needed friend. Kids need a friend. Thanks to all who make it possible for us to say yes to kids like these two and the many others who need the love and care of our Shelter.
Taking time for God
It isn't often that we can assemble all our employees in one place at the same timel And we didnt accomplish that the other night at the school. But we did get half of them at a time for a spiritual emphasis program that featured visitors from Cambridge, MN, Erna Ahlmann, a former CSC resident who is volunteering at our school this summer, and former Head Nurse Warlita Manlon. The services, planned by Joel Reasoner and myself, started after school on Tuesday, July 26, and again at 6:00 pm, with a nice meal served in between. Dan and Andrea DeRushia from the First Baptist Church in Cambridge, MN, who are visiting CSC with Dennis and Sharon Eicher, led the singing, Rianne Nijzink of our staff sang "Children Need the Lord," and Erna Ahlmann gave a testimony of her life before, during and after CSC, which was a great encouragement to our workers. This was reinforced as Dan sang a special number and talked about how impressed he was with their work and dedication. Warlita talked about Moses, the first adopted child in biblical history and the way that god spared him and blessed those who cared for him. She finished with a short salvation message.
We are concerned with the spiritual health of our workers, and these services were inspiring and faith-building as they consider their important roles in the ministry of CSC.
Saying Yes and No
We've taken in a few new kids in recent days. And we have had to say no to a few referrals, too. The fact is that we can't help every child who needs us. That is easy to say but tough to live with when the child is especially needy. But we only have so many beds, so much personpower and so much money. Sometimes its a matter of timing. Maybe we could have said "yes" to the tiny premature baby in the government hospital who needs an incubator and one-on- one care, probably for months, if the referral had come before we took in the malnourished baby from the other government hospital in town. He also needs one on one care. But we could say "yes" to two small sisters who were abandoned in downtown Cebu City and who were living in a drop-in center with other street kids. And we were able to take in a brother and sister who were living in the city dumpsite and whose parents were nowhere to be found. There is a lot of joy at CSC when we are able to take in new children. Not for the circumstance that led to our being needed for them, but for the opportunities to make crucial interventions in their lives and reverse some of the fear, abuse or malnutrition that they have endured. Thanks to the deal people who stand with us as we admit these kids to CSC, providing the material and prayer support that helps change their lives for the better.
I'm Just a Kid
“I’m just a kid and you are a teacher.”
I laughed and I was amazed at the same time when I heard this statement from one of my students. We were doing our oral development activity when one of my students refused to make his own sentence using the new words we had learned that day. Other students were thinking hard and constructing sentences using the words, but this student was struggling.
I called on him and at first he was very hesitant to share because he was not ready. He hadn’t formulated even one sentence in his mind, so I gave him few more minutes to think. The class discussion had been really good; other students were enjoying the activity and sharing their sentences.
Again I called on the student and I said, “Hey buddy, I think you’re ready to share your sentence with us. You look like you have been thinking hard.” He smiled and looked at his classmates. They cheered for him and encouraged him by saying, “Try lang.” (English-Cebuano for “try please”)
I stood beside him, cheering him on and praising him as well. He stared at me and said in a nervous voice, “Teacher, I’m just a kid and you are a teacher.” I caught myself beginning to laugh when he uttered these words.
Then I stopped and told the student and all of his classmates, “Yes, you are all kids and you’re still young and I was once a kid too. But let me ask you these questions: Where are you right now? Why are we here? Have you thought that maybe we both have the same goal and purpose?
We are here in school to study and to learn. This doesn’t mean that I’m a teacher and I know everything. It’s not as simple as that. Learning is a two-way process. You learn from me and I also learn from you. I’m here to help, teach, guide and mold you to be a better person in the future.”
After our conversation, the student was able to formulate his own sentence and everybody clapped for him. In the back of my mind I told myself I’m lucky to be a teacher. I may not be rich with jewels, but I’m rich with good and happy memories because of my experiences. I have a lot of memories already to ponder in the future.
Fil-Am Friendship Day
A Day of Friendship
Every 4th of July is Friendship Day at Cebu Children of Hope School. On this day, there is always a special time set aside for everyone to gather together and have fun.
This year, the celebration was great. Everybody, especially the students, had fun. There were a lot of friendship games that taught them good values like cooperation and considering others. The highlight of the celebration was a parade as a finale with candy tossed to the kids. It was very special for the students. They all had fun picking up the candies and sharing with each other. It was a joyful celebration.
Meetings galore
Meetings. Our ministry relies on lots of meetings. These mostly involve internal matters: staff and leadership meetings; school faculty meetings; social work, child development and nursing departmental meetings; referral meetings; counselor and house parent meetings and meetings with all the child care workers. We meet with adoptive parents when they come to get their children, highlighting their medical histories and developmental and behavioral progress . The other day our Social Work Director Klaris and I met to discuss a needed meeting with the Social Workers to prepare for another meeting. Wow. And sometimes, meetings just kind of happen. The other day I popped my head into Joel’s office and we got to talking about a bunch of stuff, and Willard joined in and pretty soon we had an unscheduled buta full-fledged meeting. We also have meetings outside of CSC, with government officials, adoption workers and sales persons.
But there are so many things to discuss and decide upon at CSC: case management; behavioral issues with the kids; schedules; health matters; counseling strategies and decisions about which children we should admit. Having meetings means that we value the input of others and that we need their counsel to make the best decisions possible. Our staff consists of people with wisdom, experience, enthusiasm and dedication - good participants in the meetings that help us steer a proper course for the ministry of CSC.