Most Cebuanos my age grew up with a saying that goes “Bisan saging, basta loving.” This saying means that even when the family is eating bananas all the time, as long as they love each other, the family is okay.
The passage, Proverbs 15:17, “Better a meal of vegetables where there is love than a fattened calf with hatred” reminds me of that old saying. It also reflects on the situations CSC’s children came from. Not the whole, but the part about bananas and hatred. The kids at CSC have come from different situations of poverty, neglect, abuse, and abandonment. Some of the kids came from loving situations that deteriorated because one parent died suddenly. The one parent left behind could not cope up with trying to earn a living while taking care of the children at the same time. Some of the kids came from broken families. Most of them were abused before being cast aside when a parent got involved in a new relationship.
Bisan saging basta loving. Better a meal of vegetables where there is love than a fattened calf with hatred. Some of these children did not have anything at all, no bananas, no vegetables, no fattened calf, no one to turn to, and most of all, no love, but had an abundance of hatred at times.
Kindness, understanding, patience, hope, faith, joy, grace, and most of all, love. This brings to mind that this is what CSC is all about. It is not because of the beautifully maintained houses, medical building, and school, nor the playground and other things, though all of these have helped. But, it is the people that made the shelter what it is. Feelings of warmth and welcome are created by people who are kind, generous, patient, hopeful, understanding, even-tempered, and most of all, loving. Different backgrounds, educated to the less educated, Americans and Filipinos, people who answered God’s call to pray, give generously, volunteer their time during mailings, and serve on the CSC Boards both here in Cebu and in the US. They came together to serve in a ministry that not only provided a roof over the heads of these children, but the loving-kindness and the grace of God that the children had not experienced before.
At CSC, there is no “bisan saging basta loving,” and “no better a meal of vegetables where there is love than a fattened calf with hatred.” CSC is a big home, a big family that God has blessed with His love and grace. Thank you Lord for the people who answered Your call to serve in this ministry.
These are your friends, too.
The last time I was in Cebu I brought a picture with me to give one of our children, a little girl in our Duterte Home. She has lived at CSC since June, 2011 with her two brothers. They came out of extreme poverty, and have made great strides in our care.
The picture I carried was from a group that sponsors this little one as a part of our Foster Friends program. They contribute a monthly amount to provide care for her as a partner of CSC. We have families and individuals who do so through Foster Friends, and in this case, we have a Kiwanis club who gives love across the ocean.
She was in awe of the picture as I explained who this group of people were to her. I had recently spoken to the group and gave them an update on their sponsored child. What a privledge it was to pass along a picture from them and tell this little girl, "all these people care about you." Her eyes lit up and she held the picture with great care as she scanned the faces of the people who give something of themselves to love her. Here she is proudly displaying the photo with two of her friends.
Every day the children at CSC see people who love them: the auntie helping them dress, the house parent leading devotions and the teacher answering a question. There are many people acting as the hands and feet of Jesus in Cebu. And, there are people all over the world making up those hands and feet along with them. What an honor it was to witness one of our CSC kids getting a glimpse of them.
The best kind of visitors
Actually these are not visitors, but family members coming back home. We have a fairly constant flow of visitors coming to CSC, we have people who find us online and want to visit to see if we are who we say we are, we have supporters who make a once in a life time journey to see where their money has been going all these years, we have adoptive families coming to claim their long awaited son and/or daughters from us, many other mission groups in Cebu enjoy bringing their visitors to see us, we have our own biological family members come to visit…the list goes on and on.
The best kind of visitors for all of us is when our own CSC KIDS come back home to CSC. This has been happening a lot and is always a wonderful time.
Siblings Joe, Roxanne and Carlo are here with us now! They left us for adoption 11 years ago and are back to visit us as well as their birth family. We also have Erna, another one of our own CSC kids back here working in our school for a couple of months. We all love seeing our kids come back, but it is an extra special blessing for all the CSC aunties and uncles to see the kids return. I get to see many of our CSC kids when I am in the States, but our Filipino aunties and uncles only get to see the kids if they return here. It is so fun to see their faces when they see the kids that they cared for many years ago back in the home that they lived in while at CSC. It was hard for them to say goodbye many years ago. These kids return visit helps our aunties and uncles to be able to continue caring for the kids here now, and to keep saying goodbye…we need our CSC kids to keep coming back!
We have had lots of kids come back, some of the things that they remember are precious, some are embarrassing and some are just plain funny. I only recently learned that Joemar (who has lived with us almost 30 years) was the willing recipient of quite a few of the kid’s vegetables; no wonder everyone loved Joemar; he was eating their vegetables for them! We have certainly noticed common reactions and comments for kids coming back; we hear many things like ”I remember the playground being bigger than this!” and “I am taller than the aunties, did they shrink?”
What a blessing our CSC kids are…we hope they keep coming back home to visit!
We're Off!
We have about forty-five minutes left in the first day of school. Whew! The kids came this morning with new hair cuts and new shoes, all spruced up for the occasion. Of course, the kids were wondering who their teachers were going to be in the morning and afternoon classes. "Who is Teacher Lyrah?" "Who do I have for Civics?" After the kids went home for lunch, the teachers breathed a collective sigh, thankful the morning had gone relatively well. With six new teachers, that was a good sign. The day has not been perfect with one minor disagreement between two boys and a couple of scheduling snafus, but everyone seems happy to be here. Carpe diem!
Shared Birthday
I know many of you readers are quite familiar with birthday parties and how CSC works to make each child feel special on their big day. Did you know that staff often feels special as well when they celebrate their birthdays?
I definitely felt that last night as it was my birthday!
I share a birthday with these two ladies and enjoyed my time with them. My family is also visiting and they were able to share in the birthday party, which made for a very special night for me! There’s really nothing like being able to celebrate your birthday with a bunch of kids AND your family on the other side of the world. I was greeted by many kids and heard echoes shouting through the playground as we walked up of “Happy Birthday Auntie Megan!” I received numerous hugs and even a card with a poem!
As I reflected back on this time and think about the various and heart wrenching life situations the kids came from, I’m humbled by how they are joyful beyond measure. The kids are kids. They know how to play, run, learn, and explore even though they may not have had that opportunity before coming to CSC. They also have an uncanny way of making adults feel special, whether or not its their birthday. Almost anytime I’m hanging around with the kids, a hug or a greeting is one of the best things I receive. Acceptance and love exudes from their demeanors, and that was true even last night as these twins shared their birthday celebration. It takes a special personality for some kids to be excited about sharing the lime-light with an adult and well, these girls are definitely set apart and special!
I may never have another birthday like this one due to the fact that I’m living in the Philippines and experiencing life in a new way. I am joyful and grateful that God placed me here for this time in my life and that he has allowed me to experience the joy and love of these children!
Sly Smiles and Fake Tears
Most of the kids at CSC speak some level of English which is great for me because I don’t speak much Cebuano. I’ve noticed that when one of the kids doesn’t want to answer a question or try to figure out how to say something to me in English, they appear to forget how to speak it altogether. They know I get lost in that language and they can usually squirm out of a question like “Did you just get called inside for bath time?”
The children here are very well behaved so this isn’t a huge issue, but I’m pretty sure a cute little kid smile and my lack of language skills have gotten me conned into letting a few youngsters get away with something they probably shouldn’t have.
I was playing around with a number of the kids the other day. We were running, chasing, playing tag, and giving piggyback rides. We were having a great time. At one point my friend here started stomping around and was beginning to speak loudly in whiny, mumbly half Cebuano half English. I knew she wanted a piggyback ride but I didn’t want to reinforce her behavior. In an unusual moment of how-to-deal-with-little-kid clarity I got down to her level and said “Please stop whining and tell me what you want”.
It was incredible…in about 2 seconds the embellished poor-me behavior stopped. No more stomping, she opened the squinting eyes that were trying to produce tears and in perfectly clear English she said that she would like a piggyback ride. I thanked her and she rode off all smiles and joy (I had to ask her to stop screaming in my ear though)!
I get blown away at moments like that; when I can step aside from the look on a child's face and realize that sometimes its a false indignation meant to produce a result! I'm sure the practiced parents out there are laughing at my lack of skill here but it is clear to me that while I may be the adult, it’s usually the 4 year olds that have me figured out. At least, every now and then, I can peak around the curtain and realize how much I have to learn!