Children are explorers. Curiosity often leads them to peek inside the doorknob's key hole; enthralls them to touch a squealing kettle; and ferry their feet into places where they are not allowed to be. Often, boundaries are broken.
Children are expressive. Emotions often steer their ship as they navigate their social world. They jump, giggle, grin, and laugh when happy. A frown, a downturned face, and a shoulder-drop paint their sadness. Talking back, kicking the wall, shutting down, spitting, throwing things, and crying are the easiest cards to pull out when they are angry. Often, adults' patience is challenged.
Children, most of the time, do not listen, nor take heed of instructions and reminders; they have a loose grip of morality that even memory verses fall short of reminding them to be good. But this does not mean we stop teaching them to be kind. This is to remind us that children are fallible and that they do not have the skill sets to fully self-manage; even adults have difficulty regulating themselves, too. And children who misbehave a lot are often painted with a different color palette, viewed as a problematic child.
At CSC, children do not only go through these developmental obstacles. They are also bringing with them their adverse experiences. For some children, this baggage magnifies their difficulty to self-regulate. Without a proper lens, dealing with these children might be quite challenging. As adults, the common response is to control these behaviors but with the aid of Trauma Informed Care, houseparents, caregivers, and other staff have a better understanding of the underlying factors of such behaviors. Rather than seeking control, comfort is offered. Rather than spending time preaching the rules and whatnots, cultivating a relationship is the focus. Rather than seeing the child as problematic, the child is seen as a work in progress, still growing to reach his/her full potential, and to give the child a chance to lead a more meaningful life. Through Trauma Informed Care, we are always reminded with how Khalil Gibran viewed how children should be guided. In his poem, he said:
"...You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable."
Khalil Gibran, excerpt from On Children
Sports Fest 2023
Sports Fest is a popular event in every school in the Philippines. Teachers in every institution set a time for planning and preparing for this event. Most schools are excited to find new talents or ways to enhance students' skills in sports.
As a Physical Education teacher at Cebu Children of Hope School, it is fulfilling to see the students' excitement and joyful expression as they participate in each game. Through this activity, it is also fun to see their reaction when they win or lose the game. It is a great opportunity for the teammates and coaches to cheer and encourage the players.
During the competition, there are always mixed feelings. It brings out the best in every team member and sometimes teaches each participant a lesson to learn when the game does not go according to the team's plan.
Here are glimpses of students' experiences during CCHS Sports Fest:
"What I like about Sports Fest are the games like the tug-of-war where you can see the teamwork and support of my team through helping and cheering each other, hula-hoop, jump rope, high jump, and egg toss." – Maribel
"I like playing many games, our team chants, and the refreshment prepared for us by the teachers. I am grateful for the fine weather and the awards that we received at Sports Fest. We were the overall champion and I ranked third in the Running Long Jump III event." – Ryan
"I like to see the faces of the people in the Sports Fest when they are happy. Aside from that, I like the dancing part because every one of us is confident to dance. Seeing us dancing confidently makes me happy." – Jay-em
"I like the tug-of-war because I can see the strength and the joy of my best friends. I am so proud that we are the overall champion of this year's Sports Fest." – Raphael
"I like to watch how my co-players execute teamwork in their respective teams. I am so proud that I ranked 2nd place in the Limbo III event. – Jerame
Sports Fest contributes a big part in their life being a student. When they participate in this event; they will learn lessons that might never happen in the four walls of the classroom.
Toddler Playground
As a young child, my fondest memory with my friends were playing outside with them. Our little neighborhood did not have a playground or enough space to play. Instead, we made use of trees, tall grass, and other people’s vacant lots where we can play slipper game (similar to a kickball but with the use of slipper game). We played hard until our knees were skinned and we were covered with dirt. We were hard work at play.
Play is essential to the development of a child. As Jean Piaget once said “Children require long, uninterrupted periods of play and exploration.” It is in play that a child discovers their self, the people around them, and their environment. That is why at CSC we make sure that play is part of a child’s routine.
I talked about “space” in a previous blog back in 2020. In the Philippines, space is something we don’t care too much about and it’s also something we don’t have much of. I have very good view of the CSC grounds from my office window. I see our children play every afternoon and what a joy it is to see them hard at play.
If you have been here to the shelter, we have a separate playground area for our young children which is located at the back of the Duterte Home. Here, children ages 5 years old and below can play safely and away from the rough play of the older children in the main playground.
Because of the generosity of our donors, we recently purchased new playground equipment for our young children: slide, swings, and spring riders. I’d like to highlight that the installation of the equipment was made possible by both CSC employees and our older residents. It is one of those moments at CSC where both employees and residents teamed together to make something wonderful.
We held a ceremony before opening the playground to the children. It was a short dedication as the young ones could not wait to try the new equipment; even the older children wanted to try.
“And the streets of the city shall be full of boys and girls playing in its streets.” Zechariah 8:5 ESV
Check out the kids enjoying the new playgound!
"Kasama"
Kasama is a word in Tagalog that has many meanings, depending on how the word is used in a sentence. As a noun, kasama means "companion, housemate, associate". As a verb, it means "to be together". As an adjective, kasama means "together with, accompanied with, staying with".
You can see kasama used in a very technical sense, like when describing charging cord that is included with your phone or electronic device.
You can also see kasama in a more meaningful context, which is what I'd like to describe to you.
I've heard it said that your neighbor is the one who crosses the road for you. In the parable of the Samaritan and the man who was left for dead, we see that the other two who noticed the man and his condition actually walked on the other side of the road to avoid the man who was desperate for help. But the Samaritan drew near to the man and not only took note of his condition, but invested his time and money to help the man and to see that he was restored to full health.
This is true kasama: together with, accompanied with, staying with.
At CSC we strive to be together rather than apart. We have learned that being together helps build community. We can learn from each other and support one another. We can celebrate with and mourn with one another.
This is my hope for us all, that we would model that adjective form of kasama to whomever is in our path today. Let us not see that person as an obstacle or someone to avoid, but as an encounter and someone we are called to care for.
Grace and Peace,
Kirby
The Scent of Joy
By Eric Abellana and Meravic Nalang (Counselors)
Emily Dickinson once wrote that "there is no Frigate like a book." In her poem, she described how a book could ferry us to faraway lands or unfathomable seas. That poem has a lulling melody yet a compelling voice. In counseling, we have different frigates that have helped us guide the children in exploring their faraway lands (future and goals) and unfathomable seas (past and trauma). Talk, art, and music have been a great help for several years in dealing with children in counseling. This year, the mothership was finally realized.
On May 20, the counseling department finally moved to its new space, the Alimyon Hall. Alimyon is a Cebuano word for scent/aroma. Although we use scents/aromas as an aid in counseling, this is not the reason why the space is named Alimyon. We believe that emotions put the colors to our thoughts; behavior is the scent of our emotions—a scent that can be seen rather than smelled. In this new space, play has been the frigate that helps us in dealing with the children. Toys, a lot of them, like sand trays, art materials, and musical instruments are present in Alimyon. These have evoked a lot of emotions from the children.
Joy is the dominant scent here as younger residents dive into their world as they start to play. They become attuned to the present, focusing on the story of their play. For older residents, play allows them to reconnect with their inner child with the help of sand trays. Through their play, we can have a glimpse of what they've been through; where they are going; and what they are hoping for. With smiles on their faces, excitement in their voice, and the calmness of their hearts radiate the scent of joy.
Play has always been the most comfortable language for children. You let them play with toys, and they will tell you a story. You let them play some musical instruments, and you'll hear the anthem of their days. You let them play with colors and they will give you masterpieces that outshine Van Gogh's or Monet's. Emily Dickinson was never wrong about books. They surely ferry you somewhere. Play offers the same to children.
Space and Time to Grow
We are all aware that most living things on our planet need food, water, light, the right temperature, and air to survive. Moreover, they require extensive time and ample space to develop entirely.
One of my former students once passionately shared his dream of becoming a farmer during our morning meeting routine. He even emphasized that he wanted to own the land he would farm. Whenever asked what he wanted to become in the future, he consistently responded: that he wanted to own land he could farm. I was glad to learn that, despite his age, he is highly confident of the dream he wants to achieve in the future and shared with the class the reasons why. It was heart-warming to hear from a student who once struggled to control his emotions in class before, now has made a positive transition with the help of the significant people in his life.
Their home economics and livelihood education class covered gardening during the last quarter of the academic year 2021-2022. As the teacher planned the activity with the students, they expressed considerable interest and showed their eagerness to participate. After weeks of in-depth discussion on the fundamentals of gardening and identifying the necessary tools, it was time to put the lessons learned into practice. The class decided to grow eggplants and agreed that if it produced some fruits several months later, we would have to find a recipe that needed eggplant as its main ingredient.
After ten days of care for each of their pot, the seeds began to sprout. It was a success!
What stood out to me the most as we talked about the lessons they had learned from the gardening activity was that one shared a realization that learning can be enjoyably done both inside and outside the four walls of the classroom.
After six months, my students excitedly shared that the plants were already bearing fruits. They said they had taken good care of their plants during the summer.
For this school year 2022-2023, two of my former students are still my current students, and the other has moved to high school. That means he was already in a different class. Nonetheless, we invited him to participate in the agreed cooking activity, and he gladly accepted.
So, on September 28, 2022, after obtaining permission to hold the activity at the shelter, we decided to cook "Crispy Eggplant Fries" and "Eggplant Burger Steak."
One of the activity's best moments was observing how they accomplished the task, how well they worked together, and how committed they were to their education. I could tell they were delighted to have the eggplants cooked and tasted. The class loved it and expressed interest in giving the recipe to their house parents and designated cook so they could prepare it at home and serve it to the other children. This is an incredibly significant experience for them as kids, and it's great to know that they learn the concept of planting so they may grow their food in the future, whether it's for their consumption or business purposes.
As living things, plants require ample space and time to grow, in addition to sunlight, the right temperature, moisture, air, and nutrients. The same is true with our kids, who face challenges and overwhelming emotions. They deserve not only our love, support, and guidance but also ample time and space for themselves to maximize their full potential and develop the abilities that God has given them.