Staff Blog
How can people be so heartless?
How can people be so cruel?
Easy to be hard, easy to be cold
How can people have no feelings?
How can they ignore their friends?
Easy to be proud, easy to say no.
Songwriters: Ragni, Gerome / Rado, James / Mac Dermot, Galt
The words of this song from the late 60s were brought to mind recently when a 12 year-old boy was referred to us. His story reveals the heartlessness and cruelty of people, and the ways that some children have to suffer at their hands. We'll call this boy Roberto and his younger brother, Michael.
Roberto and Michael were brought to an orphanage in Cebu City when they were babies. The orphanage, which was connected to a Protestant church, was not a good place. When the boys were older they were abused. Punishment was severe, sometimes cruel. The lady who was in charge of the place was the one dealing out the beatings. Luckily, the place was closed down and the children were parceled out to other child caring institutions. CSC got three girls from that place, but we did not have room for boys at the time, so Roberto and his brother, then nine and 10, went to live at a home for children on a neighboring island. Shortly after there arrival there, one of the boys threatened Roberto. (The home catered to older kids, and their residents included some who had lived on the streets and were used to fighting and intimidation.) On the second night they were there, Roberto decided to run away. Michael was afraid to go out into the dark night, but Roberto was able to find a young boy, just five years old, to go with him. The gate was always left open so they had no trouble getting away.
Roberto only knew one place to go, back to the church where he had lived. He didn't know that it was 18 miles from where they were starting out. And they had to cross a long bridge that led to Cebu island. But he knew he wanted to leave that place, so off they went into the night.
It took two days and nights to get to the church. They slept
along the road, wherever they could find a spot that looked safe. On the second
morning Roberto woke up and discovered that his little companion was gone.
Without a trace. All he could do was keep going. When he finally got to the
church he found that it was closed up. The gate was locked. One of the former
orphanage workers said that he could be their family's houseboy, but that didn't
last for long. One day that family packed up and left, and Roberto had no place
to go.
Out of desperation, he found a big piece of cardboard which
became his bed for the 
next months. He slept just outside the locked gate of
the former church/orphanage. He would look for food wherever
he could find it, in garbage cans or occasional handouts from neighbors. Other
times he would steal food to feed his hungry stomach, which enraged people in
the community. He was often beaten by neighborhood boys. One family took pity
on him and would stop the boys from beating him, and would give him food. Life
was hard for Roberto. No place to live. Nobody to take him in. He missed his
brother and worried about the boy who had disappeared along the way. How can
people be so heartless? How can they be so cruel?
One of the compassionate neighbors knew about CSC and informed us about the situation of Roberto. We get lots of referrals and can not respond immediately to all of them. Eventually our social worker and counselor went to visit Roberto and hear his story. They were overwhelmed by the things that had happened to him. In the next few days we made contact with the place where Michael was staying and arranged a meeting with their social worker. Two of our social workers, Chris and our new Social Worker Director, Klaris, and our counselor, Eldie, made the trip to the neighboring island to discuss the boys' case. Michael was relieved to hear that Roberto was okay. He hadn't heard anything about him for a year and a half. Both boys wanted to be reunited and it was determined that this should happen the next day at CSC.
The reunion was so sweet for the boys. They were more than a
little amazed at the facilities of CSC and the course of events that had
brought them back together. After more counseling and some medical
tests, and a talk with a representative of the place where Michael was living,
our staff made the decision to admit Michael and Roberto. The boys would no
longer be separated and Roberto's days of homelessness would end. It was an
exciting day for all of us. They boys needed to go back to their respective
places, get the few things they owned, and say goodbye before becoming official
CSC kids. But first we brought them to Jollibee, a fast food restaurant near
CSC. It was so much fun to watch the boys eat and laugh. It must have seemed a
little surreal to them to be together at that place with a group of adults who
were concerned about them and wanted them to be together in a nice and safe place.
Roberto was not able to finish his chicken and we were surprised when he asked
if he could have a bag for "take-home."
When they got to the place where Roberto had been staying, he ran to one of the houses near the church, the place where one of the people who had protected him from the cruel boys lived. This was the first person who had shown concern for him, maybe in his whole life. Roberto wanted to give this guy the leftover chicken from Jollibee! It was one of the most touching things that we have known about in our many years of working with kids. A few acts of kindness had made a huge difference in Roberto's life and he wanted to say "thank you" in the only way he knew how.
Later that day the boys were
officially admitted, and spent the night in the infirmary while 
we waited for
their lab results. The next morning they moved into the Cherne Home, where
house parents Tarex and Pureza and the children welcomed them. It was the
biggest day in their lives, so far. And there are many big days ahead. They
will be making a lot of new friends and will soon be enrolled in our Children
of Hope School. They won't be apart. They won't be hungry. If they are sick
they will be provided with the best medical care available in the Philippines.
If they are sad they'll be comforted. And they will get the chance to learn
about a loving Heavenly Father and a friend and Savior who will never abandon
them.
Yes, its easy to be heartless. Easy to be cruel. But its also easy to be kind. Easy to be a needed friend. Kids need a friend. Thanks to all who make it possible for us to say yes to kids like these two and the many others who need the love and care of our Shelter.
The Best Phrase Ever Uttered
Thursday, June 27, 2017. First day of the 2017-2018 school year. The journey of all the students is about to begin. Students and teachers are all excited. It has been two months since the summer vacation started and now it has come to an end. Students have grown and become more mature.
On this promising day, I witnessed God’s love and how He touches each person’s life. It was the last period of the afternoon classes. Science was the subject which is everybody’s favorite. I was nervous yet excited knowing that they were the toughest class last year. There were a lot of “what ifs” running through my mind. To my surprise, as I stepped in the classroom everyone was sitting nicely, smiles on their faces, and they welcomed me with enthusiasm.
Student 1: Wow! Teacher Lyrah!
Student 2: Are you our science teacher, Teacher Lyrah?
I answered them back: Yes, I’ll be your science teacher for this school year.
Everybody started clapping and kept on saying, “Yes! Teacher Lyrah!”
I couldn’t hide the happiness inside of me when I heard those words coming from the students. They showed so much excitement as I began teaching the lesson and they were even engaged as we discussed the rules.
These students are more than just a blessing because they fill the empty space in my heart with this phrase, “Thank you!” Such a polite expression coming from them. Each time I distributed their notebooks, pencils, erasers, and their science books they never failed to utter the phrase, “Thank you teacher!”
They made my day extra special! I am excited to continue to teach them throughout this school year and help mold them to be better individuals in the future!
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Mini-Version
Most people get a "watered-down" version of Cebu when they come as tourists. Some only see what the tour guides want them to see. Some fly into the airport on the neighboring island of Mactan, but never cross the bridge that connects it with Cebu City. They experience the five star ambiance of the lush resorts and rub shoulders with wealthy people and well-trained staff who pamper them, but they never observe the realities of life in this Third World city. They are sanitized from the poverty, the pollution and the suffering of people in our city.
Visitors to CSC also get an abbreviated version of the story of the ministry. Although we show them our facilities and let them meet our staff and, when appropriate, some of the kids, we aren't able to give them the bigger picture. They see our wonderful homes and get a sense for the quality of care that our children receive. They visit our school and learn about the education that we provide. And they often have questions answered about where our children come and how they can help us.
But there is so much that goes on behind the scenes at CSC that is not apparent to visitors, even if they stay for more than a few days. They probably don't see the efforts of the social workers, child development team, teachers, nurses, therapists and other personnel who make it possible for us to bring children in and provide them with the comprehensive care that they require. Efforts like these:
- Social workers out in the field, working with birth families and gathering information needed for procuring birth documentation, or processing referrals;
- Meetings, meetings, meetings. There are at least ten meetings every day, both formal and informal, involving child care workers, house parents, counselors, therapists, office staff, social work and child development teams, school faculty and security and maintenance workers. These meetings involve financial planning, behavioral issues and updates, strategizing difficult case management issues, and sitting down with people from other agencies, both private and governmental, to advocate for our children;
- Nurses bringing children to labs, doctors' offices and clinics for medical assessment and care;
- Counselors meeting with children to discuss issues from their past or difficulties they may be having at CSC;
- Workers meeting with house parents to discuss problems in the home;
- Team-building activities, staff development and training that aims at making CSC a better place for the children who live here.
- Office staff handling the payroll, purchasing, banking, bill paying and other financial management tasks that are essential to keep things running smoothly;
- The work of transporting these workers to accomplish these tasks, and to get children to school or to doctors or dentist appointments. Our fleet of 10 vehicles is constantly being used to support the many activities and appointments that are needed.
- And, while they may get a sense for the financial needs of a program like ours in Cebu, they don't see the constant fundraising and promotional efforts going on in Minnesota through our stateside office. They don't know of the decisions being made by families and individuals to give generously and sacrificially to CSC for the care of the children, the same ones that they are observing on our playground, at the supper table or marching off to school.
We are thankful for each person who makes a contribution to the ministry here in Cebu, back in MN and around the world. People like you. I wish you could each be recognized by those who lead the tours here at CSC, because you help make the good things that they see possible.
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Prepared Just For You
There are few things more rewarding than carefully preparing something for someone special to you and then showing it to them. That happened this past Tuesday in Banawa, the site of CSC.
At 8am a long line of little bodies walked up the dirt road from the shelter to their school and every face was filled with anticipation. The dedicated staff of the Cebu Children of Hope School had carefully worked and planned for two weeks in preparation for the start of the school year. Our first day began with an assembly where the students were introduced to their new teachers. The excitement from the children could have been from each one getting a new pair of shoes last week, it could have come from having extra CSC staff present to see the first day of school, it could have come from the immaculately clean building they were entering. I think it was something else. I think it was because each child knew that someone who cared about them had spent time preparing something special for them.
At the Cebu Children of Hope School children know that every teacher cares about them and is willing to do what it takes for them to experience success. I am honored and excited to lead this dedicated group of teachers who daily love on these beautiful children. It is going to be an amazing year!
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Grace
God's grace shows itself to me in many ways. Some are glorious and some are not. 
By the grace of God, for instance, I have enough to eat, a good place to live, money for my diabetes medications and meaningful work that provides many emotional, material and spiritual blessings. But just 0utside my office are children who go to sleep hungry, who wake up with nobody to say "good morning," and with only bleak prospects for having their basic needs met. This noon I drove to McDonalds for a late lunch and was heading back to the office to eat. At the stoplight a little boy approached my car, tapped on my window and held out a deformed hand to ask for money. He motioned to his stomach to indicate that he was hungry. In his eyes was a hunger that went beyond his need for something to eat to indicate a hopelessness at life in general. But he doesn't have the luxury of looking at his life reflectively. He was hungry, and was looking at the food that I had purchased at the drive through that was on the seat next to me, food that I could easily do without. I gave him a handful of fries and drove off. On other occasions I might have just shook my head and not given him anything. Nutritionists might say that he was better off with nothing than a greasy fry, I don't know. But as I drove away my mind came up with many questions that I have considered often in my 38 years in Cebu, questions that don't really have answers but weigh heavily on my heart on occasions such as this.
- Why does this little guy have nothing and I have everything? Is there a single thing about how I have lived my life that qualifies me for advantage? Has this little guy done anything wrong to deserve a withered arm and a hungry tummy?
- Why didn't I just give him my whole lunch instead of a few paltry fries? By suppertime I would be dining on a good meal and he would be hungry again. Likely, I just wanted him to go away from my car.
- What does he think about me and what I represent?
- If he ever does look to the future, does he have a shred of hope that things will get better for him? With little or no positive family or other adult influence, with no access to health care or decent education, and with daily exposure to the many dangers from living on the street, is there any chance whatsoever that he will? What will be different for him, his eventual children and theirs?
- What is life like without hope? Can I even begin to understand that?
The disparities of life in a country like the Philippines are hard to grasp. Living here provides graphic proof that God's grace has nothing to do with merit. Not a thing. That kid deserves a break much more than I ever do or will. All I can do, perhaps, is to think about why God called me to live much of my life here and not in the country of my birth. Some people think that, in choosing to live here, I forsook the luxuries of life for the difficulties of the third world. But I live in the lap of luxury here, too. I just have to pay an emotional price for doing so as I come face to face with people who struggle just to stay alive.
I've been dealing with these same questions for 38 years! At CSC we have been able to help lots of little guys like the one I saw today. We have taken in the hungry, the lame, the disfigured, the homeless. We have dispensed food, medicine, knowledge, even hope. But we aren't helping this little guy at all. Except for a fistfull of fries. Of course we can't help everyone, I know that. But that knowledge doesn't remove his image from my mind or, on the other hand, make his life one ounce better.
I pray for wisdom, to accept the things that I cannot change, to be an agent of positive change where I can, and to know the difference, even though knowing that difference does not provide emotional relief from the confrontations with hopelessness that are a part of life in a place like this. I guess the best way to accomplish the dictates of the above-cited Serenity Prayer is to focus on the things that I can change, not on what I cannot. On the tree, not the forest. But I'm very sure that there are things that I can change if I open my mind to them, to see people not as an inconvenience but an opportunity. Maybe I can use some of the incomprehensible advantages that have been bestowed on me to offer some measure of relief and, maybe, even hope to people like the little boy who I cannot get out of my head.
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Fathers
The dust has settled on Father's Day here in Cebu. For me it was kind of an 
emotional day. I lost my dad a year ago on Father's Day, and it was with a mixture of sadness and thankfulness that I reflected on Jer. I was given lots of cards and hugs from CSC kids, which helped. And my daughers greeted me, which was great. I have always been thankful to them for "sharing" their dad with so many other kids over the years.
Father's Day can be a little complicated for the kids at CSC. Many of them have birth father's who were absent, abusive or neglectful. The reason that many of them had to come to CSC was because of their birth fathers. They preferred the company of their buddies to their children. They squandered money on gambling or alcohol while their kids suffered with sickness or hunger. They found other women, abandoning their families. They took out their anger and frustrations on their kids.
Coming to live at CSC meant that children had a second chance at family and that started with house parents who love them and see that their needs are met. So, children who suffered with difficult birth fathers are now benefiting from house fathers who are helping them understand what a Christian home is all about and the meaning of fatherly love. Nobody is ignoring them. Nobody is abusing them. Nobody is making them feel worthless. Instead they are valued, disciplined with fairness and love, and taught about a Heavenly Father who loves them unconditionally and deeply. It was fun to see the CSC kids honor their house fathers on Father's Day!
Some of our kids are soon to be leaving for adoption, where they will have new fathers and mothers. Right now we have 11 children who have been matched and accepted and who are awaiting the completion of their visas so they can join their new families. New relationships await them, and one of the most significant will be having a new father to love them in ways that are different than anything they have previously experienced. We hope and pray that the love of their house fathers at CSC has prepared them to accept and return the love that their adoptive fathers will give.
So, many of our CSC kids will have four fathers in their lives: a birth father who gave them life; a CSC house father who was a part of their healing and preparation; an adoptive father who provides permanence and a special kind of love, and a Heavenly Father who will love them eternally.
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