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Imagine what it would be like to wake up knowing today is the last day you will see your child. I wonder how carefully you would choose their clothes or the last words to share with them. I wonder how hollow it would feel to stand on the sidewalk as they are driven away. 

Imagine returning home without your children in tow. They were with you when you walked out of the neighborhood, but now you walk alone. Your world is upended. You’ve lost the title “mom” or “dad.” To make matters worse everyone is watching you from their front step or window. Secrets don’t keep long where you live—especially secrets like this.

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People know what you’ve done and they don’t restrain themselves from staring. This is a lonely walk back to an empty home.

You can’t believe it got to this point. How could it? You didn’t have children to abandon them. But then he left, and there were no jobs to be found. The life you dreamed of isn’t visible anymore, and you don’t have anywhere to turn. Somehow the best option became giving them away.

Sometimes when I’m speaking to a group a person will ask how our kids end up in the care of the Children's Shelter of Cebu. I’ll confess that for most of the children a parent is still alive. “How could their parents just abandon them,” they wonder. It’s hard to explain. In our good-Christian mentality, you just don’t ever give up on your kids.

It’s hard to describe the straight jacket that is total poverty and utter hopelessness. It’s hard to explain not being able to protect or provide for your child. I can’t pretend to understand, but I know it’s easier to demonize the mom who couldn’t care for her baby than to put myself in her shoes. She doesn’t deserve to be understood because of what she’s done. Right?

I don’t know. High horses are easy to climb on when you’re propped up in a world of options. Judgment comes easy on this, but judgment has always been easier than understanding, including when a mom concludes her child is better off without her.  Judgment isn't our job at CSC. Our job is to love that child the best we can. It's the least we can do for those moms whose seperation is not the mark of selfishness, but of sacrifice.

 

Birthday Prayer

Feb. 22, 2024By: Jinkee Reasoner

Meet a delightful five-year-old who is eagerly anticipating his birthday this month.

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Four months ago, whenever I had a chance to talk with him, the topic of our conversation was always his birthday. He was already excited for his next birthday! But, unlike other children who come up to me telling me what birthday gifts they want to receive, this boy had asked that he and I should celebrate our birthdays together, since mine is in April. He wants me to pray for him on his birthday and that he will pray for me.

This exchange of conversation has been going on since then. What struck me the most is this five-year-old boy giving a particular importance for prayer, birthday prayer to be specific. This is our hope. For children to have a heart of prayer. And for us at CSC, to be picked by the birthday celebrant to pray for them is such an honor. If you are celebrating your birthday or just celebrated your birthday, I pray that you will be a blessing to others and that the Lord will use you mightily!

S.M.I.L.E.

"A smile is worth a thousand words."

Julie A. Walker

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Most, if not all, of the children who come to CSC find it challenging to convey their feelings. While very few can use words, most of them are not able to. Sadness or fear are usually expressed in silence, tears, tantrums, or stomach aches. Joy or happiness is expressed in hugs, drawings, flowers, or petals picked along the driveway, and mostly in SMILES.

A child's smile keeps us going. When days are long and overwhelming, the genuine smiles on our children's faces give us the strength to carry on.

A child's smile reminds us to count our blessings, especially during the days when we lack cheerfulness and forget all the good things.

A child's smile speaks gratitude to our hearts. Even when words are absent, we still hear their "thank you's."

A child's smile is contagious. Even when our hearts are heavy, we smile because they do.

A child's smile matters because not all children can or will smile at CSC. But when they do, we know our language of love speaks to their hearts.

A CSC child's ...
S – smile gives warmth
M - making our day bright,
I - inspiring us to not give up,
L – leaving a mark in our hearts, and
E – encouraging us to look forward to brighter days ahead.

Dear child,
Thank you for your smile. You don't know how many hearts you have touched when you smile.
May God continue to put a smile on your face and make us instruments for such. May your smile
reflect God's sweet embrace and loving touch in your life today and always.

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A Happy Attitude Leads to Greatness

Jan. 18, 2024By: Alfie Abella (Teacher)

As the eldest of nine siblings, I was always responsible for most of the household tasks. I used to whine
about the chores my parents gave me. But then my father told me that no matter how simple a task is,
like picking up a spoon, if you don't put love into it, it will be difficult.

From that point forward, I used that simple concept to accomplish my goals, and I was pleased that I
was successful in several ways.

In my teaching career, I apply this through our morning meeting activities in the classroom. Morning
meetings are a school-wide classroom management strategy that meets kids' social-emotional learning needs regularly. Every morning, teachers assemble their students in a circle for 15 to 30 minutes to socialize and start the day. This classroom management technique is a fantastic help for us teachers as we transition students to their goals in class. I can tell which students require more time to code-switch
their feelings into a learning mindset, transforming negative emotions into positive ones.

In my eight years of teaching at CCHS, I've noticed that kids who are emotionally preoccupied with
unnecessary thoughts are unable to comprehend the concept being taught and it is challenging for them to retain the information.

To assist the students, I allow them time to process their feelings/thoughts that were unrelated to the
classroom discussion and be ready once they are inside the classroom, or I explained their role
through pre- or post-class discussion. Then, tell them that there is a time for everything, and to set aside
what initially bothers them and focus on the purpose of their coming to school and deal with their other
thoughts another time.

I believe success occurs when you have a positive attitude, choosing to love, and be cheerful in all that
you do. Being happy and contented in our daily interaction leads to great things in this world, no matter
how challenging the circumstances are.

Proverbs 15:13 says: "A happy heart makes the face cheerful, but heartache crushes the spirit."

Sparks of Joy

Jan. 8, 2024By: Arlyn Verdeflor

Aristotle once remarked, "The whole is greater than the sum of its parts," yet holistic well-being often falters when individual elements are neglected. Thus, the Tibuok ug Kabahin (whole and part) initiative for mental health awareness came into being. This endeavor spotlights the complete spectrum of emotional, psychological, and social well-being, collectively defining our mental health. It underscores how these facets influence our responses to stress, interactions with others, and the choices we make.

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Having had the opportunity to care for children with a range of adverse experiences, we encounter indirect trauma and carry our own stories of adversity. Our joy is often stolen from us due to these experiences, emphasizing the need to prioritize mental health to maintain a healing atmosphere.

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Through the initiative, we were able to foster fellowship and create a space where vulnerability was encouraged. It provided us with a sense of being seen and heard. It was a moment to take a long sigh after years of working hard, indulging in good food and massages, and sharing laughter. Not only did it raise awareness about the importance of mental health and well-being, but it also gave us an opportunity to embrace our stories, no matter how complicated, painful, or heavy they were. And that brought healing to each one of us.

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Overall, the Tibuok ug Kabahin (whole and part) initiative serves as a testament to the transformative power of acknowledging and prioritizing mental health, fostering an environment where healing becomes a shared endeavor. May we continue to cultivate spaces that encourage vulnerability, celebrate the human experience, and inspire the pursuit of joy, both in our personal lives and within the workplaces that shape our daily existence.

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Looking Forward!

Jan. 3, 2024By: Kirby Stoll  ›  Author Bio

Blessed to be a Blessing

Another year is upon us. Already! Someone once said, "The days are long, but the years are short." I'm not so sure any more. It seems that time is moving faster and faster, at lease for me it is. So, what do we do?! We LOOK FORWARD with anticipation for all that God will do with the time He gives us and consider ourselves BLESSED—and blessed to be a blessing.

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Henri Nouwen writes, "It is remarkable how easy it is to bless others, to speak good things to and about them, to call forth their beauty and truth, when you yourself are in touch with your own blessedness. The blessed one always blesses. And people want to be blessed! The voice that calls us the Beloved will give us words to bless others and reveal to them that they are no less blessed than we."

For CSC, the new year holds countless opportunities. There will be birthdays to celebrate. There will be comings and goings of children who enter our homes and those who are placed with families. There will be many milestones to celebrate, both for the children in our care AND for the employees who care for them. Not to mention there is a massive construction project going on currently that, Lord willing, will be ready for move-in at the end of the year—but such much to do before then for that to happen!

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We at CSC commit the year to upholding our Mission as a way of being blessed to be a blessing. We know first and foremost that we exist to glorify God and demonstrate His love to those around us—being a blessing. We look forward to all that comes our way and we hope that, just maybe, you will cross our path at some point in the year, too.

Blessings,